Name: Mike Lorigo
Hometown: Lancaster, NY
Job Description: Owner and president of Pillar Real Estate Investors — we own and manage over 800 apartments units all over WNY.
Number of years as a dad: 12 years (has three daughters, ages 12, 10 and 8)
How has your approach to work changed since becoming a dad?
It’s evolved over time — my work hours and day are more structured now. I’ve made it a point to focus on a good work/life balance. It’s coming to the realization about what is really important in life. I’ve had to re-evaluate my priorities and life in general.
You have to support your family, but it’s not all about financial gains. For me being there for my children — going in to school for a party, or on a field trip — they’re going to remember those things. I’ve re-evaluated my professional goals so that I can be there for my kids
What does vacation time look like for your family?
We made a decision years ago that we were going to minimize gifts during Christmas and put our resources towards a yearly family vacation — we’ve done Boston, Chicago, NYC, a Disney Cruise. We typically go over one of the kid’s school breaks, and I make sure to block off that time. In the summer, we do vacations with alternating sides of the family (my family, my wife’s family).
We also have a house on Chautauqua Lake that we try to get to as often as possible. The kids love going there and hanging out, sometimes just for a long weekend, usually over the 4th of July and other weekends during the summer.
What boundaries or limits do you set on your work time that help you to create healthy routines?
On the weekends, or at dinner, I’m not going to take phone calls. It’s not life or death. I do the same thing in meetings at work — I want to give my colleagues my full attention, so I’m not going to take a phone call in the middle of a meeting. I do the same thing at home when I’m with my family.
Your best piece of advice for managing the family and work life balance?
The biggest thing I’ve learned is that no matter what you do, you can’t outrun time. As the kids get older, and it happens so quickly, you can’t get that time back. Try to enjoy it in the moment. I’ve talked to people who say they’re going to work hard and spend time with family later, but you can’t get that time back.
Name: Jayson Roland
Hometown: Amherst, NY
Job Description: Pediatrician at Williamsville Pediatrics
Number of years as a dad: 19 years (has three daughters ages, 19 and 15 year old twins)
As a pediatrician, do you have a pretty consistent schedule?
When I chose pediatrics, lifestyle was a big factor. I was looking at critical care and emergency room opportunities, but there is no regularity or predictability there. My schedule is pretty much the same each week.
What are the challenges of your job in terms of commitments and hours?
It’s very easy to be sucked into working more hours, doing more things — there are committees and meetings, there are promotional dinners. I don’t usually go to night meetings unless they are critical to business. I could easily work more, but it’s taking the long view of things. Working more now isn’t what is going to be beneficial in the long run — it’s not going to get me anything I really need or care about [in terms of family relationships].
What are some of the things you do to spend time with your family?
I take each of my girls out for breakfast once a week — they take turns, one each week. We’ve been doing that for years. You have to create opportunity for that to happen, and you never know what will show up in that time. Sometimes the girls actually save things to talk to me about, and other times they have nothing to say, and that’s ok.
We’re always looking to create memories. Last year, when our oldest daughter graduated from high school we decided to go on a trip [to Europe] — to have a shared experience — rather than a graduation party. It was really nice. We also do a lot of little activities — we love to go for hikes and just be outdoors. There is a lot of good research about the benefits of being outdoors. Last week we went to the Lockport Nature Trail, anywhere we can go to get out. The girls are accustomed to that.
What is your biggest tip for managing the balance between work and family life?
Taking the attitude that it’s about their needs before your own sometimes. Being a pediatrician, I’m very sensitive to the needs of children and seeing kids who don’t have support or stability. Sometimes I come home at the end of a long day and might just want to relax, but I haven’t seen the girls or my wife all day. I’ve taken the approach that my answer will always be “yes.” Whatever they want to do when I get home, it’s “yes.”
It’s worth it — it’s worth putting in the time and effort. You do have to put some of your needs aside at times, and that’s ok. It’s about looking at life with the long-term view.
Name: Rob Sproull
Hometown: Amherst, NY
Job Description: Math Teacher at Mill Middle in Williamsville
Number of years as a dad: 12 years (four children, current ages 12, 10, 8, and 4)
What does your daily schedule as a teacher look like?
I usually get to school around 8:15am to offer extra help; the kids arrive at 8:45am and classes end at 3:35pm. I am usually there until 4pm, and then head home. I have learned to work hard — get all of my grading and planning done — while I’m at school, so that I don’t have to bring a lot of it home.
What are some of the benefits of being a teacher in terms of your family schedule?
The benefits are great. Both my parents were teachers, one of my aunts was a teacher, one of my brothers is a teacher — I come from a teaching family. I saw the benefits early on — the vacations we were able to take and the schedules aligning with family vacations. I do teach summer school, but we’re usually done by 11:30am — I really try to enjoy family time during the summer.
What are some of the things you try to do to be intentionally present as a parent?
I do a lot of coaching for the kid’s teams — I rotate between them. Sometimes they fight over who I’m going to coach for during a specific season! I’ve coached Amherst Youth Soccer (fall and spring) and Amherst Youth Basketball. If I’m coaching, it has to be on my schedule, and then it’s set, which helps.
What types of trips and vacations do you go on?
We try to go to Florida — we’ve driven there several times as a family. In the summer we get out to our family cottage on Lake Ontario. I love the outdoors — fishing, hunting, being on the water. We try to do a lot of that with the kids, get them into some of the outdoor activities that we like.
What is your biggest tip for managing the balance between work and family life?
You can’t say “we’ll find time” when this or that is done. You have to push everything else aside and make those things happen. It doesn’t happen unless you’re intentional about it. It’s all about creating memories.
Bottom line for me — I have to keep my priorities straight. In our family it’s about putting God first. You can lose patience quickly, and energy. You can feel like you’re never doing enough, but you have to look at what you’ve been blessed with. We’re never perfect and we’re never going to be, but we can try our best and focus on the positives.
Name: Eric Czubaj
Hometown: Sloan (Cheektowaga, NY, where he is also on the town board)
Job Description: Owner of Winged Foot Screen Printing, a local company that does screen printing for many local non-profits, bands, school clubs, sports teams, churches and local businesses.
Number of years as a dad:
10 years (three children, ages 10, 8 and 6)
What is one of the biggest challenges with owning your own business?
When you own a small business that is growing you are often everything — the accountant, the secretary, customer service, quality control — you know, everything. That can be tricky sometimes.
I’ve also come to realize that it would be very easy to work more hours if I wanted to, especially on the weekends. It would mean more profitability for my company, but we made a decision years ago that weekends would be devoted to family time and so that is where we’ve learned to say no to growing bigger in our business so that I can spend more time with the family.
How do you balance being present at home with being committed to your work?
I have to compartmentalize — when I’m at work, or in a busy season of work, Jessie and the kids know that and I don’t always function well at home, but that it’s just for a season.
The rest of the time I am committed to not having my work email come to my phone, and minimizing the number of work calls I will take when I am home. When I leave work, I leave work — the customer might not get an answer until tomorrow morning, and that has to be ok. I’ve had to put boundaries on the communicative technology so that I can say I’m a “dad” right now, or a “husband.”
What are some of the ways you try to be intentional with your kids?
Sometimes it’s just trying to do something all together, even if we know it might be chaotic — going out to dinner, going to a park, etc. I also try to coach some of their sports teams when I can. I’m currently coaching co-ed elementary soccer at their school. It’s a great way to do something fun, and to get to spend more time with them.
Best tip for balancing the balance between work and life?
You have a choice with your time — you get to choose what’s important to you, and what’s important for the future. Being most profitable now isn’t necessarily most profitable for our family’s future. Financial profit isn’t necessarily what makes our family more happy — it comes at a cost. It’s about always keeping that in mind.
Name: Steve Barber
Hometown: Hamburg, NY
Job Description: Financial Advisor with Janney Montgomery Scott, Williamsville
Number of years as a dad: 17 years (four children ages 17, 16, 13, and 11)
How long have you worked as a financial advisor?
Actually, this is a second career. I worked as a television reporter for Channel 7 for 11 years. I loved it, but the hours are crazy. It wasn’t conducive to family life.
I was in my 30’s and went into full-blown study mode to get certified as a financial advisor, which wasn’t easy with young kids. Fortunately, my wife was doing well in her business, so I knew we could make it on her income during that time.
Do you have a work schedule you try keep during the week?
I do. I have a traditional 9-5 schedule, but that’s not how it’s always kept. Family is first for me and my office really supports that. We are a very family-friendly office. We’re coming into baseball season now and most games start at 5, which means I’m often out the door at 4. That said, I often take client calls while I’m out at the ball field, that’s just sort of what work/family life looks like.
Also, when I’m home at night I try to be 100% home at night — the phone and social media goes off. When I’m at work, I’m 100% at work — that’s how you balance it.
What are some of the things your family does for fun?
With four kids it’s hard to find a time when we’re all at home, but when we are it’s nice to just decompress. Sometimes we just all sit around and talk, or watch Netflix. We just like to hang out with each other and catch up. When we’re all home either I or Sarah will cook and we all eat dinner together. We’ve learned to let go of some things — we have four kids, nine out of ten times when you walk into the house it’s probably going to be messy. That’s ok.
What is your biggest tip for balancing work and family life?
Whatever my priority is — the most important thing I have to do today — I do that. You can’t let the rest of it bother you. That’s when the emotions start to kick in, telling you that you’re failing. I’ve had to let the other stuff go. Everyone is going to have their own unique challenges — figure out what is right for you.